You meet someone, start to date, fall in love, and get married. After about a year and a half, romantic love starts to fade. You wake up one morning; and realize that you don’t feel quite the sizzle you once felt for your spouse. You start to notice his big ears; and he begins making comments about the extra pounds you have put on. So, now what? How do you keep your relationship in tact? Here are some tips and things you should know that just may help.
Communicate-Communicate-Communicate! Good conversation is so important in any relationship that we can’t stress it enough. Being able to express how you feel about anything and everything will bring you closer than you ever imagined. Don’t forget part of good communication is being a great listener. If your spouse needs to talk, make sure you give them your undivided attention; and make sure you HEAR them. A good practice is to repeat what you thought you heard to be sure you are on the same page.
Honesty is the best policy. Once trust is lost, it is very difficult to get it back. Lying about anything or being deceptive in any way will put you on the road to failure.
Respect your spouse. Honor the excellence, abilities, and qualities that made you fall in love in the first place by holding your spouse in the highest esteem.
Be a team player. Working together to reach your goals will help you reach them easier and faster. Any problem, even the most daunting ones seem less troublesome if you attack together. Just knowing that someone always has your back provides a sense of security and comfort.
Fight Fair. In any relationship, it’s inevitable that there will be disagreements. If you are angry it’s always best to wait until you cool off and can discuss the issue calmly. Remember, blows below the belt and cheap shots are not relationship builders. Angry words can create a lot of pain that can linger and fester. Agreeing to never go to sleep angry will motivate you to work things out before bedtime.
You must compromise. There will be times when you and your spouse just can’t agree. No matter what it takes, you must find some common ground. Give and take is tremendously important. If you try hard enough you can always find an acceptable solution to you both.
Talk it up. As time passes we often forget to tell those we love how we feel. Just telling your spouse how great they look in the new outfit they just bought goes a long way towards keeping love alive. Be generous with praise for their accomplishments. Everyone likes a pat on the back, even your spouse. Always say thank you; and never take your spouse for granted. Treat each other like you did when you first met. Say “I love you” as often as you did when you first fell in love.
Don’t joke about what’s bothering you. If you have something on your mind, discuss it calmly. Don’t make snide remarks disguised as jokes. They are always hurtful; and will just make matters worse.
Little things matter the most. Making a grand gesture by buying your spouse an expensive gift is nice; but the little things you fill every day with matter the most. If your spouse always takes out the trash or always does the dishes; surprise him or her by doing it before he or she has a chance. Take turns bringing each other a cup of coffee in bed every morning. Hold hands and sit close together on the sofa like you did when you were dating.
There is no guarantee when it comes to long lasting love; but with a little work and dedication you can live happily ever after.
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